“Don’t take work home with you.”

This statement is something I’ve heard for years, and yet the world is quite different now. With the arrival of COVID-19, more people are currently working from home. So how do we not take home the stress of work when work is home? Through trial and error, I have learned what allows me to separate my working life from my home life. Below, I share five things that have helped me along the way. My hope is that some of these will resonate with you and will be helpful in your journey.

1. Recognize when it’s happening

We are all human, and it’s inevitable that our emotions from work can follow us home, especially if they are located in the same place. Pretending that we aren’t still feeling bothered about the work day won’t make our emotions go away. Instead, we might end up blaming other people or things around us for our emotions. As hard as it can be, it is important to acknowledge when we are carrying emotions and stress that come from work.

2. Compassion

Again, it is inevitable that emotions from work will arrive home with us. Being angry or blaming ourselves for taking work home will never take away those lingering emotions from work. Instead, we can try to offer ourselves compassion. We can remind ourselves that we are human, and with that comes emotions that are not always within our control. We may not like how we feel, but we can set an intention not to judge ourselves for it. It is also important to remember that we are not alone; it may be helpful to discuss our experience with people around us who are going through similar things. No one is immune from carrying work home.

3.  Recognizing but not engaging

This suggestion is challenging. Once we have recognized and accepted our emotions from work, it can be easy to get stuck our thoughts. Sometimes it can be helpful to share our thoughts with someone else. However, if we notice that we can’t go beyond our work-related thoughts, it’s time to change the approach. This practice involves recognizing our thoughts about work, but not exploring them further. Think of this as seeing an item on a shelf. We can recognize the item, but we don’t have to pick it up and examine it. Instead we see it, recognize it, and return to the present.

4. Engage with the Five Senses

To bring ourselves into the present at the end of the work day, we can try and engage our senses in a positive or comforting way. This might be cooking a meal, hugging your partner, or cuddling with your pet. When you notice your thoughts drifting, recognize what is happening. Then, try to return your focus to the smell or taste of dinner, the warm embrace of a loved one, or the softness of your pet’s fur. Notice what happens in your body when you engage with these senses, and bring your awareness how it feels. Using the five senses of taste, touch, sight, sound, and smell is a valuable way to practice returning in the present.

5. Establish an end-of-work routine

This tip is more practical in nature. The goal is to train our brains to recognize that the work day has finished. This can be as simple as wearing shoes when we are at our desk and taking them off at the end of the work day. Listening to the same song as we pack up our stuff each day is another example. We can even go a step further and take a walk at the end of the work day to replace our daily commute. Overall, a small, repetitive act can go a long way.

We may not be able to change the fact that work and home have become integrated for now. However, with these five practices, it is my hope that it will be easier to find a balance between work and home.

Lauren Middlemiss, M.A., RP (Q), CCC.